Category Archives: Suffering

A Lesson in Grief

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Grief generally comes at some point in our lives here on earth.  It may come early or late, often or seldom.  It can feel solitary and overwhelming.  We don’t get over the loss of someone, but we have to learn to live with that loss.  How do I live with the loss, if I haven’t been taught?  I read in 1 Thessalonians 4:13 that we don’t grieve as others do that have no hope.  I have hope, yet I still grieve.  I still feel the pain of loss. So I pray for God to comfort me, to lessen my pain.  Lessen my pain, so that I may have the courage to live life again.  Where can I find more comfort than in God’s word?  God has written “…all things that pertain to life”.  So I search, that I may apply and live.

(Isa 41:10)  Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

(Psa 73:26)  My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

My heart may feel like it has failed, my soul like it has been ripped open, but God is the strength of my heart and I know that all things are possible with Him.  He will give me strength to endure.

(Num 20:29)  And when all the congregation saw that Aaron had perished, all the house of Israel wept for Aaron thirty days.

 

The people of Israel wept for thirty days upon the deaths of Moses and Aaron on two separate occasions.  Reading through the Old Testament makes it seem that they were constantly tearing their clothes and putting on sackcloth and ashes.  Did I take the time for weeping and mourning?  What is enough time?  Am I concealing what I see as unpleasant and uncontrolled emotion and succumbing to depression and anxiety? Do I grieve in silence, or do I share my grief and let God’s children comfort me?  Have I let the world dictate how I should grieve or have I looked at how God’s people have grieved?

(Ecc 3:1-4)  For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted; a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;

There IS a time to die, a time to break down, a time to weep and a time to mourn.  And that may be the time I am living in right now.  But there is also a time to heal and a time to build myself up.  And that time will come.  In the midst of pain, it’s hard to even consider the time of laughter and dancing.  Trust that God will give me that time again.

(Php 3:13-14)  Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.

Sometimes it feels impossible to forget what lies behind, especially painful memories.  Reading this passage with grief in mind gives me hope of comfort.  Yes, we are always to strive for our eternal prize, but immersing ourselves in spiritual things and thoughts gives us more strength not to forget, but lessen the pain and sorrow of this life so that we may continue to press on to our eternal goal.

(Psa 119:50)  This is my comfort in my affliction, that your promise gives me life.

(Psa 119:92)  If your law had not been my delight, I would have perished in my affliction.

(Rev 21:4)  He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.”

God’s promise endures if we will accept it.  Can we find the comfort in the midst of our grief to know that it will not endure?  God has promised us eternal life, a life with no more tears or mourning or pain.  Yet in this promise, we see that there is a time for crying and mourning.  It is not a weakness, or a lack of faith that we will see our loved ones again.  God’s people mourn as a natural expression of the love that we have for each other when the object of that love is now gone from this life.  The pain of loss will eventually turn into the comfort of healing.

God instructs us to pray and petition Him with our requests.  What other time do we need the peace of God to guard our hearts and minds more, than when they are consumed by grief? We may see our loved ones again, but it still hurts now.  We may feel alone, but God is there.  We may be in the time of mourning, but we can take comfort in the fact that one day will be the time for healing.  It might not be today, and it might not be tomorrow, but it WILL come.  And one day, when our pain is not so great, we may need to reach down and bring it back out to help someone else find their way into the time of healing.

 

By Terry McMurray

Of Gnats and Other Annoyances

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I remember working one morning with Joe Bridges, a grizzled old… man who watched out for me on the job and had become a dear friend. From Tylertown, Mississippi, he had been a common laborer for many long years and had followed construction jobs all over the South. I often marveled at the patient, rhythmic way he worked in difficult conditions, and this morning was no exception. As I furiously fought the gnats and said unappreciative things about the day I was born, Joe seemed to take only slight notice of the devilish little insects.

“Man, how in the world can you stand this?” I finally screamed. “Don’t these gnats bother you?”

“Well,” Joe said, looking at me sideways as he adjusted his hard hat a little, “I guess they would —— if I let ’em.”

It was some years later that I understood: folks who have known what real hardship is don’t pay much attention to gnats.

One measure of a man is the size of what it takes to annoy him. Unfortunately, most of us are far too easily irritated. Since we have so little character, it doesn’t take much to get the best of us. And consequently, our lives are dominated by relatively minor vexations, things that wisdom says we shouldn’t take the time to be troubled about. We’re the victim of every little unpleasantness that comes along. But rather than grow in character and rise above these petty annoyances, we spend our lives swatting “gnats.” The real work we were sent here to do ends up being neglected because we spend most of our time and energy being annoyed.

The tendency to be easily annoyed is far more than a quirky little “personality” trait. I would suggest that many of the quite serious problems in life —— especially in our dealings with other people —— boil down to a failure of self-discipline with regard to the basic issue of irritability. If not repented of and removed from our character, annoyance is likely to cause more deadly destruction than we expect. As bad “habits” go, being grouchy is far from harmless.

When we find ourselves frequently upset over “gnats” and other annoyances, our hearts are wide open to all manner of evil things. The Bible warns about this. “Whoever has no rule over his own spirit is like a city broken down, without walls” (Proverbs 25:28). “He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city” (Proverbs 16:32). “The discretion of a man makes him slow to anger, and his glory is to overlook a transgression” (Proverbs 19:11). “Have fervent love for one another, for love will cover a multitude of sins” (1 Peter 4:8). Love is not “easily provoked” (1 Corinthians 13:5 KJV).

Paul wrote, “Let your gentleness be known to all men” (Philippians 4:5). The word translated here as “gentleness” (moderation, meekness) has been defined as “strength under control.” To avoid the destructive effects of annoyance in our lives, our strength must be under control. To do this, we must be not only self-disciplined, but wise with a wisdom that comes from God. Listen well to the words of James: “Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show by good conduct that his works are done in the meekness of wisdom. But if you have bitter envy and self-seeking in your hearts, do not boast and lie against the truth. This wisdom does not descend from above, but is earthly, sensual, demonic. For where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing are there. But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy” (James 3:13-17).

Most of us would like to have more “peace of mind.” But we tend to see “worry” as the main hindrance to that peace. What we fail to recognize is that annoyance is just as much the enemy of peace of mind as anxiety. The peace of God hardly reigns in our hearts if we’re in a constant state of vexation over the little irritations of life.

So what is it that really gets your goat? Whether it’s a big thing or a little one, do yourself a favor and give this a try: “Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good” (Romans 12:21).

 

By Gary Henry

Which Ones Have You Encouraged?

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The Lord’s church is composed of both strong and weak members. Each one needs encouragement at times, but certainly the weaker brethren need a greater amount of special attention. Also, there are some members who are not necessarily weak, but who have special physical problems, causing them to need special attention. The apostle Paul taught that the responsibility of helping the weaker members rested upon the shoulders of those who were mature, full-grown Christians (Romans 15:1; Galatians 6:1-2). In the minds of some, this type of responsibility is the work of the elders, deacons, or preachers. Indeed it is; but the instruction is given to all Christians. Sometimes elders and preachers are negligent. Sometimes there is simply more work to be done than a limited number of men can accomplish. Which ones have you encouraged?

Some Members Are Forsaking the Assembling of the Saints

This sign of weakness is obvious to any mature Christian. It takes no special training or skills to make a phone call, write a note, or drop by for a short visit to say, “I’ve missed you.” Would it be presumptuous to say almost all Christians could render service in this area?

Some Members Are Attending Without the Support (Perhaps With the Hindrance) Of Their Spouse

A mother rises early on Sunday morning to prepare breakfast and dress the children to get them to Bible class; and they leave home with the father still in bed. Sometimes the fathers have the same problem, leaving the mother at home. All recognize the special problems faced by such parents, admire their effort, and are encouraged by their faithful attendance under less than ideal circumstances. Are we not obliged to reciprocate some type of encouragement to these faithful parents?

Some Members Are Presently Experiencing Family Problems

There are parents who are struggling with a rebellious child. There are married couples who are experiencing serious problems, perhaps resulting from an immature spiritual life. There are adults who have aging parents who are sick or confined, and demand much of their time and attention. In many cases, an encouraging word may be all that can be offered. Who offers it?

Some Members Are Facing Problems Associated With Aging

The elderly and widows find it more and more difficult to do the basics, such as driving to services, shopping at the market, visiting with others, etc. Many live alone, without the encouragement or support of a faithful companion. Encouragement may be extended both verbally and actively.

This list could go on and on, but the initial question would remain the same, namely, “Which ones have you encouraged?” As the members of a congregation consider one another, the opportunities to serve are abundant. Christians may avoid the question for the present, but one day all will stand and give an answer.

By David Thomley

 

 

Count It Joy

As humans, we have a tendency to ask “why” when we experience difficulties in our lives. We may look at a situation as being the victim. God gives insight on how to handle these situations so that we may look at them as being a victor. We can expect experience difficulties as a Christian. After all, Jesus, the apostles and first century Christians endured hard times. James tells us how to approach these times in chapter 1.

We must first embrace the trial and count it joy (v.2).  Jesus said that we will have trials (John 16:33), so we should not be caught off guard when they occur.  These trials may be caused by satan, the world, our family and even brethren.   Peter tells us not to be surprised by these trials, but to rejoice in them (1 Peter 4:12-13).  Rejoicing occurred after suffering persecution for the cause of the gospel (Acts 5:41).  These times bring about perseverance (Romans 5:3).  We should look at the difficulty and thank God while adopting a joyful attitude when trials occur.  Persecution, in whatever form it may be, is a part of Christianity and when we suffer for Jesus, we should look at it as a good thing, especially since He suffered for us.

In verse 3, James says that the testing of our faith produces endurance.  Just as athletes train for their sport, we must train for Christianity.  Faith tested brings out the best in us if we remain focused on God.   Trials help us mature as Christians.  If we never have these, then we expect everything will be easy and as a result, we do not grow stronger.  Endurance denotes the ability to have consistency in the face of adversity.  We must stand firm with God, no matter what is thrown at us.  Testing can work for us, not against us (2 Corinthians 4:17).

Endurance must have its perfect result (verse 4).  Too often, we want the hard times to be over with immediately.  Instead of complaining or questioning God, we should simply endure it.   We learn to continue to seek God’s will during the hard times.

Lastly, we must look to God for wisdom (verse 5).  Wisdom is demonstrated when we take what Scripture says and apply it to our own lives.  We must look to the One who is all knowing for guidance.  Persistency must characterize our prayer life.  Especially in times of difficulty, we should become more dependent on God, looking to Him for strength, guidance and comfort.  James tells us to ask God in faith, without doubting (verse 6).

Seeing trials as an opportunity to rejoice is contrary to what the world thinks. Christianity is about seeking to please God.  It is about humbling ourselves in good times and in difficult times.  Christians are commanded to have a joy in all circumstances of life.  This joy occurs because, no matter what we endure, we have the hope of heaven.

By Randy Case Jr.

Deserting the Homeland

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Isaac Muñoz

One of the reasons most commonly cited by immigrants who leave their homeland in favor of coming to this country is opportunity. The opportunity they envision will often take many forms, but almost always involves prosperity and the chance of beginning a new and better life. However, this opportunity also brings with it a hefty price to pay. Think for a moment of all these immigrants forego: immediate family, personal and sentimental belongings, and their culture among many other things. Why are these foreigners so willing to surrender these precious things to come to a country of which they know little about? I believe the answer lies in that these people recognize that although the risk of leaving everything behind may be great, the reward of that which they can gain is much greater. When weighing the pros and cons of this decision, they determine what they will give up will pale in comparison to what they can attain in this land of opportunity.

Immigrants are not the only ones who have made sacrifices in the present in order to receive something better in the future. Genesis 12:1 tells us how God commanded Abraham to leave the land in which he resided, and go to a land which He would show him. As difficult as this command would have been to keep, Hebrews 11 shows that Abraham’s active faith coupled with the hope of receiving something better allowed him to fulfill God’s command. “By faith Abraham obeyed when he was called to go out to the place which he would receive as an inheritance. And he went out, not knowing where he was going….for he waited for the city which has foundations, whose builder and maker is God” (Hebrews 11:8, 10). Abraham’s ability to see past his current circumstances allowed him to go in search of that heavenly country of which we read about in Hebrews 11:16.

Brethren, have we learned to have this this type of vision? The type of foresight that permits us to sacrifice whatever would pose a risk to us inheriting that which is better. Throughout the New Testament Christians are often reminded of their status: strangers, foreigners, sojourners, and pilgrims (Ephesians 2:19, 1 Peter 2:11, respectively). Furthermore, in Philippians 3:20 Paul states that our loyalties do not belong to this world. “For our citizenship is in heaven, from which we also eagerly wait for the Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ.” With our kingdom not being from this world (John18:36), are we willing to make temporary sacrifices so that we may have everlasting glory? As easy as it is to cognitively know the answer is “yes,” are we actually refusing to “enjoy the passing pleasures of sin” (Hebrews 11:25) so that our death might be considered a gain (Philippians 1:21)?

While each and every sin will keep us from heaven, there are certain sins that seem to keep us tied more to this life. The forceful attraction of materialism did not allow the rich young ruler to have eternal life (Matthew 19:16-22). By all accounts it appears this young man was leading a pious life, yet he was not willing to exchange the moth and rust destroyed treasures of earth (Matthew 6:19) for the incorruptible and undefiled inheritance of which 1 Peter 1:4 promises. What a sad trade! Seeing the shortsightedness of the ruler’s decision is easy, but are we making similar choices today?

There is little doubt that money is a prominent driver in our society today. The accumulation of status, possessions, and wealth is commonly set as the benchmark for happiness. No, being prosperous is nothing to be ashamed of, nor is it ever regarded as sinful in the bible; Abraham himself was not lacking (Genesis 13:2). However, without a proper perspective of the future, the love of money will consume our present. How do we overcome this? “Yet indeed I also count all things lost for the excellence of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them as rubbish, that I may gain Christ” (Philippians 3:8). If you know that your reward will be far greater than what you can have here on earth, then it will not be a challenge to say “no” to the overtime that would require you to miss services. This knowledge will help us turn down job proposals that could force us to compromise our character, or reject shady business deals that would engage us in dishonest practices. If we are confident the offers of this life do not measure up to the prize that awaits us, then let us “seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness” (Matthew 6:33), knowing that the sacrifice really is not a sacrifice at all.

As immigrants on earth, let’s be more than willing to suffer now that we may have glory later. Let’s place our heart in heaven, that our treasure may also be there (Matthew 6:21). Is there a sin you are not willing to dismiss because of the temporary pleasure it provides? Consider the words of Christ in Matthew 16:26: “For what profit is it to a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his own soul? Or what will a man give in exchange for his soul?” Perhaps materialism is not your struggle, but whatever the sin, ask yourself if its value exceeds that of heaven.

“….and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and joint heirs with Christ, if indeed we suffer with Him, that we may also be glorified together. For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us” (Romans 8:17, 18).